Everyone has a choice, but not everyones an option.

You had a choice, & you chose the "Im-so-coolI-dont_need-anymore-friend-chasing". Not that were involved in any romantic way of course, but the least you could do was salvage the friendship. I was the option that comes in two buttons, click-able to friend on and off. Friend mode on where you can talk to whenever when you feel like it and only when you feel like it cause you feel like it. Maybe ignore is a bit too much but I cant come up with anything better to describe it as it is. I wanted to apologize but I realize I done know exactly what I would be apologizing for. I guess maybe I just want to apologize for the sake of skipping this cold war and hoping that after I do, everything will just go back to how it used to be. 

After the weeks that passed, I knew that everything I prayed for isn't going to happen. I've always been weak and needy. Needy of my friends attention whenever I'm down. And right now in college, I'm not getting it. Not as much as high school where all my friends attention was on me and my situation. The ones when I dont have to say Ooh Im sad blah blah blah but they'll just know. I was very selfish. And I really feel bad about myself. 

Its just that
A. I just have to fucking grow up and learn to take things lightly, RELAX! And dont put too much effort on something thats obviously hopeless.
B. It's college, no one really cares whats up with you. Everyone has their own thing going on so not all the attentions on you like a snotty little brat. Just thank God that he's always there when everyones not.
C. Stop being a conniving bitch.

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