20101212

Wow about a second ago, I was on flaired, I didnt realized I was logged on till I clicked "my site" so I checked all my pages including blogs, boy  I sure do express myself a lot publicly :| and I mean too much. A little bit too much. 


hihi check this, I admit, I was so bitter!! :|


I really dislike it when people hurt me (or try to) multiple times over and over again. I'm a forgiving person so I'll forgive more than once. So when they come waltzing back in my life with a lack of an apology, I'll allow it. A couple of times, anyway.

There just comes a point where an apology isn't really sincere.. If people can hurt people or say rude things but not swallow their pride enough to apologize, I don't think that's a person I want in my life. If someone can't ever admit when their wrong - not so much for why they said it or did what they did , but the way they did it - then I just don't think that's a person to have around. He's just too shallow to say sorry and try to explain things im sick of hearing.

I'm tired of people who are always quick to say how sorry they are, yet they're the same people who will tear someone down in a minute if they get a chance. And again, they'd appologize to you and said things were done unintentionally.

I can be nice to people I don't like. But it doesn't mean im being plastic. Just being civil about it. It's no problem for me to be around them if I have to. I just wish when I'm being nice to them, they didn't think that was an open invitation for them to try to ease their way back in. I can forgive, and I do forgive. But that doesn't mean I have to allow them back in my life. I can never forget what they did, or what happened.

No, I haven't always been innocent in all of the situations. I've said some things I probably shouldn't. Because regardless of how evil the things that were done to and even if I was just retaliating, I don't want to hurt anyone. I just really dont want them in my life, even If I end up hurting people.

But hey, what can you do? I'll just continue living my life and letting it go. Some people will always need to feel like they're better than someone else. And well, doesn't pride always come before the fall? Truth be told, I don't really want them to fall. I hope they climb down the latter before that happens.

Anyway, maybe I'm the one being prideful thinking I should have an apology for the things I said or tried to do to hurt someone. Even if they were vile, what makes me think I deserve an apology? Pride, I'd say. :)) Hahaha!

Truthfully, it'd just be nice to know that they didn't mean it. I don't like admitting this but: I know im not a good person and I did terrible things in the past, I also want to be forgiven, but being friends is out of the picture.

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